10 months and counting… and a bit of intrigue.

In 5 days it will be 10 months since my dear Teen has heard from her mother.

I can’t even begin to tell you how much it breaks my heart.

Even though we havent talked about it in a while. I think she is starting to focus on living her life without her in it at all. Which is sad, but definitely for the best.

My mom has been visiting for the last couple of days, and it seems that the Teen corrected her about who her Mom really is. She’s just started referring to me as “Mama” in the last couple years. Really since the Maniac was born. But my mom taking about something that was mine and she used my name.. and the Teen replied, “That’s my Mom’s.” Or something like that. I found it very interesting.. but in a wonderful and good way of course.

So get this-

I’m sure I’ve mentioned that I tend to stalk  check out the Baby Mama’s Facebook page fairly regularly. I learn lots of interesting things from it. She appears to have a boyfriend now. She changed her profile picture to a silhouette of the two of them kissing. Lovely.

Here comes the intrigue…

A few days ago I see a post on her wall from her mother. (This is a direct quote by the way)

Baby Mama’s Crazy Mama-  “What are you having?????? Still waiting????????”

Baby Mama- ” Don’t know yet. It’s killing me to!”

I see only two possible explanations for this conversation..

1. Making dinner plans.

2. Baby Mama has a bun in the oven.

Oh, and a few hours after I saw this post, it was gone!

I don’t even have words to describe my feelings if it is indeed #2.

My poor Teen. She’s not going to take that well at all. And seriously, how do you explain that… “Oh, sorry.. I have bothered to call you in almost a year..  blah blah blah.. oh yea and by the way you have another half sibling.”

I’ll keep you posted if I find anything else out.


5 responses to “10 months and counting… and a bit of intrigue.

  1. Heartbreaking, yes. But your “teen” is a lucky girl to have someone like you to be a REAL mom for her. Keep doing what you’re doing. You can’t control anyone else’s behavior. Big hugs.–Aunt Debbie

  2. I don’t know all the details of the situation, but if the Teen really wants communication/a relationship with her mother then it definitely is heartbreaking. My kids want nothing to do with their father, and it’s actually a battle when he finally calls or decides he wants a visit. From what I’ve read it sounds like you two have a good relationship and you should be proud of that. When the Teen is an adult and starting her own life that is what she’ll happily remember.

  3. All you can do is be honest with her when the information comes out…and offer love, unconditional.
    sometimes we are not related by blood to our true mothers.


  4. momto3ofherown

    I have a pre-teen Stepdaughter whom has not seen her Mother for almost 10 months also. But it was her choice. I wonder, is this a typical thing for teen girls to go through? I do not find it normal, although I know and totally understand why my Stepdaughter won’t even entertain the idea of seeing/talking/texting or emailing her Biological mom. What were the circumstances between your Daughter and her Biological Mother that they do not speak?

    • notsowickedstepmom

      Her mother just doesnt bother to keep in contact with her, I believe that she’s too caught up in her own life. It started as soon as she came to live with us. First she’d call once a week.. then once a month.. then every three months… then every six… now it’s been almost a year. She hasnt seen her in two years. I don’t think there is anything nornal about it. I can’t imagine not talking to my girls every day let alone for a month or a year! My Teen is at camp right now, and I’m having a hard time not being able to talk to her this week.. especially since they called and said she was sick one night. I’ve been compeltely worried about her! Anyway- I think that as much as it hurts her, she’s probably better off not having to deal with the heartache of the empty promises, the excues and everything else that comes with the coming in and out of her life whenever she pleases.

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